As a family man, the head of the household, the Christian man must understand who he is in Christ. Having confessed Christ as Lord and saviour, submitted to God’s stewardship over his life, fully committed to the word and will of God. He must manifest these traits publicly. We are not Christians because we say so but by our actions.
Christianity is a way of life, a lifestyle that requires deliberate discipline and self-control; the word of God being his go to life manual. Jesus remains the Christian example and standard in all things; manifesting Christlikeness.
Our Christian men (fathers, husbands, brothers, and uncles) in particular, will do well to go back to spiritual basics in order to reposition themselves aright before God. The reality of our families, homes, marriages and relationships reveal a serious departure from godliness. Therefore, for the family, homes and relationships to flourish, our men, especially should embrace their spirituality and spiritual discipline. For example;
- Discipline of Purity
Infidelity, bondage to libido, is not sexual freedom, when you are controlled by your lust and immorality you destroy not only your walk with God, but your family, your testimony and integrity. Purity of thoughts, desire and action are critical essentials before God. (1 Thess.4:3-8, Job 31:1). The sin of King David and the consequence thereafter should teach how to behave, 2 Sam 11 1-27; flee all appearance of evil, 1 Thess.5:22.
- Discipline of Relationship
The absolute importance of cultivating a personal relationship with God cannot be overstated. To be all that God calls you to be, maintaining this relationship is vital. When the relationship with God is alive and progressive, it’ll have a positive spin off on the home and other relationships.
- Discipline of the Mind
Phil 2:5, tells us ‘let this mind (attitude) of Christ be in you’. The mind of humility and sincerity, of pleasing God and doing His will. The potential of possessing the mind of Christ is the scandal of today’s church, for if it did, much of what is going on in our men and the church could not happen.
- Discipline of Devotion
as husbands, Fathers and men of God, it is important to be filled with God’s word, not just reading the bible but meditating on it to do what it says, ”be ye doers of the word”, Jam1:22 .
- Discipline of Integrity
Integrity is no longer a visible virtue in many of our Christian men, lying cheating, compromise, the way of the world dominates; but this cannot be the report of godly men. The importance of integrity, honesty cannot be overstated, ethical conduct, as in the ‘old days’ when a man’s word was his bond. ‘A good name is better than riches’
- Discipline of the Tongue
We all know what havoc the tongue can cause, toxic mouth that spews out venom. Men with such problem of filthy, abusive words, even in the presence of children, need to sanitize and fill their mouth with the word of God. A mouth that makes you a disciple of the devil, insulting your wife with hurtful and dismissive words is totally unacceptable and wicked. Also such men don’t know who they are. How men talk in the home, to their wives and family is really very important.
- Discipline of Work
Some men have an aversion to work preferring to live off others, but God commands that a man should work. So regardless of economic and societal challenges; a man ought to find work. It is very important not only for your self-worth but also doing something to glorify God. Don’t become a child to your wife. No work, No eat!!
- Discipline of Perseverance
Without perseverance, one can hardly achieve anything. For the families, homes, relationship and personal endeavours to stand, men must be focused and determined. Patience is a virtue, a fruit of the Holy Spirit; it’s a must have. Through perseverance obstacles are overcome
- Discipline of Truth
As the head of the household, as father, a husband, a man; truthfulness has to become you. Learn to speak the truth, it’s the only way to teach the children. Its leadership by example, Children copy what they see.
- Discipline of Love
Love is everything. Not as the world loves which is fleeting and passing away with time but as God loves, unconditionally (1 Cor. 13:1-8). Love your wife, your children, family; for charity (love) begins at home. If you are a tyrant, unloving to your family but kind and considerate outside you are a hypocrite. Respect your home and those in it.